Writing is such a cathartic tool for me, and yet the process of putting language on a screen or page shifts throughout the year. Sometimes I don’t have words, and other times, they are less straightforward. I’m at peace with honoring the flow of when and how I say things, but it’s also interesting to now have this frequent newsletter in the mix.
Last week I attended a poetry writing workshop. It was a bit of a last minute choice, but having gone, it clarified my recent writing block. The prompts were about finding hope in hopeless situations. And what I could not say in a lengthy narrative, I was able to outburst through stanzas.
I think there is a real beauty to saying what needs to be said, but in a way that’s like a verbal dance. A bridge from unconscious to conscious.
I have thoughts I’ve been collecting for a future post about all the transformative understanding I’ve been sitting with. But for now, here are experiments with verbiage from my workshop that felt appropriate to share.
Untitled Melanin
At age 5 the brown
Skin was burden
A punch in the gut
Names like faggot
For walking with a limp
25 years, and the eyes
Peppered throughout my pores
Cried for the chance
To gaze with flesh that’s similar
The narrative of events
Between the decades is
Elusive, because Melanin
Was neither here nor there
It was displaced
Displaced amongst whatever
Bodies were willing to
Come closer
Mostly white
It is interesting to mature
As a means of ideological dissolving
Emptiness as a strategy for survival
And now, wholeness.
Of skin cells, tear stains, heart pressure.
There is some place
Deep within the bends of my elbows
That no one can cross
A sacred portal for
Dancing with ancestors
Where my strongest
Practice of solitude
Is compact, tended to,
Tickled by Spirit.
I Forgive You
Laying on the mat
Halfway present
Next come lines about a masseuse
Dropping my underwear
Asking if she can touch down there
And I say okay
Because I’m not fully here
Trauma poems
Are not enough to
Do the work
Resolving a trespassing
But enough time has passed
I’m aware it wasn’t my fault
And I feel it wasn’t hers either
I believe I’ve tried my best
To forgive an unforgivable
And here is where I cry
But with peace
Love Energy
I’m in bed
With fumes of “what ifs”
Inflating my heart
I’m staring at the ceiling
And the presence of
What I deeply desire
Is actualized, center forehead
Wow, I am so close
The manifestation
The 3D form of my
5D whispers
What do I do with
These leftovers?
Where and how can I share
My cup that runneth over?
Water, bursting through every
Cell of my body
Yearning to give so much
Where does it all go?